Episode 263: Checking the Facts When You're in Conflict

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In this episode of Black Girls Heal, we explore the importance of checking the facts when feeling threatened, especially for those healing from trauma. 


We discuss how trauma can heighten our threat response, making it difficult to discern real threats from perceived ones. The episode delves into the skill of 'checking the facts,' a concept derived from dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), outlining practical steps to take for regulating emotions and improving conflict resolution. 


My personal stories and examples highlight the nuances of threat perception, emotional regulation, and the impact of trauma on relationships. 


We also tackle the challenge of making amends if you realize you've misunderstood a situation or person. 


Tune in for essential tips on fostering better personal relationships and self-awareness.


In this episode, we cover…

  • 01:06 Understanding trauma and threat response

  • 02:55 The skill of “Checking the Facts”

  • 04:20 Dialectical Behavior Therapy Explained

  • 07:03 Personal reflections on trauma responses

  • 18:42 Steps to check the facts

  • 30:17 Why you should challenge your assumptions

  • 44:36 How to make amends with healthy and available people


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Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Shena Lashey